Smooch and her imaginary friend

Poor Smooch. She has been working overtime lately, alerting me to snakes on the porch. It's the same drill day after day. I'm inside working, Smooch is outside patrolling. I hear Smooch's mom-there's-a-snake bark. I go outside and pick up the snake pole from its home atop the saddle stand. I lasso the snake, then walk down the driveway carrying the snake pole with the snake dangling from the end. I go out the gate, into the field, release the snake, then go back home and return the snake pole to its appointed spot. Ho-hum. Just another day at the ranch. Apparently I've lost my fear of snakes. The drama and excitement from snakes gone by has jaded me. That is not to say snakes are my friends. It's just that I've caught and released so many of them, they've lost their ability to give me the heebie-jeebies.

For those of you unfamiliar with the mechanics of a snake pole, allow me to offer this detailed technical illustration.


Everything I learned about snake poles and snake relocation, I learned from Mikey, and I am forever in her debt. It's much more practical, say nothing of humane, to catch and release a snake than to kill it (and yes, I learned this the hard way). With a few dollars' worth of PVC and a hunk of clothesline, it is quite simple to lasso the snake, pull the opposite end of the rope to "tighten the noose" temporarily, then relocate and release the snake in an area away from your dog, your house, and your flip-flop-wearing feet.


But here's the problem. Smooch doesn't understand the intracies of our catch-and-release program. Each time I've done the snake drill this week (that would be four but who's counting?), I've come back to the porch, returned the snake pole to its designated spot, and watched Smooch have a hissy fit. She stands by the snake pole and barks and barks and barks as if the snake were still wriggling at the end of it. The lingering scent of the snake on the rope must be overpowering. I don't have the heart to tell Smooch she's seeing things.

I just have to learn to distinguish her mom-there's-a-snake bark from her mom-it-smells-like-a-snake bark. In either case, I'm getting lots of exercise this week.