a tarantula...a brown tarantula...a female tarantula.
At least rattlesnakes make noise and tell you they're out and about. Not these gals...they're the silent enemy. I fully understand that they were here first and I am in their territory. But for cryin' out loud, stay the heck off my porch! This is where my dog sleeps! This is where my pig eats! This is where I walk barefoot!
I went back into the house to get my camera. What a surprise. I looked around for something to place next to the tarantula, to give you a sense of scale. My checkbook? My coffee cup? My ruler!
I cracked open the office door. The tarantula was lying in wait. I tossed the ruler in her direction, and she obligingly walked right on top of it.
That leg span looks about 3.5" to me.
I reviewed my options. Get a broom and sweep it off the porch, sparing its life and allowing it to live for 25 -40 years, giving birth to 500 -1000 more tarantulas every stinkin' year, who might one day walk across my porch, scaring me half to death. That's 12,500 - 40,000 tarantulas from her alone, not counting the offspring of her offspring.
Or sweep it off the porch, then throw a great big rock on top of it.
If that was on my porch, there would be no question as to what I would have done......Just like that snake that visited you.....Bam...Bam....Bam
ReplyDeleteOh, did you know I hate spiders as much as snakes....just look at the hairy thing.
I knew when I clicked on your blog by the title, I was going to cringe.
Hmmm. I wouldn't have to think real hard on that one. Big BIG rock! They so totally creep me out.
ReplyDeleteGood LORD, woman - what kind of hellishly scary state is New Mexico, anyway??!!! Poisonous, biting snakes...freakishly huge hairy spiders...eeeeeeeek!
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking you just shouldn't go outside anymore - at least not until you and those THINGS come to some kind of understanding! :-)
Sweep it off the porch and throw a rock on it right now! YUCK! She gives me the creeps!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteoh
ReplyDeletemy
god
if i ever, EVER see one of those cross my path..I will be up the nearest tree...peein' my pants.. screaming like a holler monkey..and having a massive coronary!!!!!!
oh
my
god
im TOTALLY grossed out
shiver
::::Sleeping with the lights on tonite::::
LOL Yes I have to agree with farmgirl up there. You've got a lot of ummm, icky creepy crawlies there!! Are those a threat to your animals? The spiders? I'll bet that made a big splat! :p
ReplyDeleteYa.....I think I would go with the rock. Anything in the desert with 8 legs makes my skin crawl. Ewwwww.
ReplyDeleteI have an award for you. Stop in when your not fighting off large creepy critters or sankes. :)
Awesome. Do you have to worry about her going in the house, or will she pretty much stick to the outdoors? I gotta say I'm sure I'd be freaked out, but if she's willing to stay outdoors then leave her be. If she's that big, just think of what she's EATING!
ReplyDeleteTrust me, my friends, I went with the rock option. And I didn't have to think too hard about it, considering it started crawling up the broom as I was mid-sweep. The ruler remains on the porch. It's covered with tarantula cooties and I'm not sure I want it back in my drawer.
ReplyDeleteEwww! A rock, a huge frickin' rock, a can of Raid, and a shotgun - that's what i would use.
ReplyDeleteOh. My. God.
ReplyDeleteMy stupid little bug stories pale in comparison to your giant monsters. Christ! That thing is so damn big, I'm not sure it would have occurred to me that I could kill it. I'm glad to know that a rock is the answer. Something tells me Raid and a paper towel would not have been enough.
(found you via the black box)
I hate spiders anyway, so something that big and hairy would absolutely FREAK ME OUT! Being as I know nothing about them ... are they in your barn or in your stacked hay? I mean I guess you've REALLY got to be on your toes when outside cuz of your varmints.
ReplyDeleteOkay, so there are a few things about New Mexico that aren't that great..... Glad no one got bit!
ReplyDeleteYikes! Glad you went with the rock option. Those things are just plain nasty. I'm thinking if I were you I would keep a big pile of rocks stacked on one end of the porch, just in case of more snakes and spiders.
ReplyDeleteI think you might have finally and permanently killed my vicarious love affair with New Mexico, the Land of Enchantment, or HORROR, depending on how many of those spiders come crawling!
ReplyDeleteThe bigger dilemma for me would be that in spite of being terrified of that thing, I would never be able to kill it. My husband would be doing spider relocation every time I spotted one. Yikes!
It's spider season here too - there is a big fall spider literally in the opening of the laundry room door leading out to the back yard. It makes a flying leap into the butterfly bush every time I open the door.
This morning, there are two "writing" spiders on the front porch, one in the window, the other one on the door frame itself, and that one has a 3-inch leg span and HUGE body.
Aside from the horror factor, seeing a spider in that dramatic way is a very good SIGN. Creativity, balance, infinity - she's a symbol of good things. :)
Okay. I'm SCARED, very SCARED now! My friend, Barb, who lives up the hill, had a tarantula in her yard. The kids watched it. The next morning, when Barb found it, a tarantula wasp had laid her eggs on the tarantula. Did you know they do that and the eggs hatch and then the babies EAT the tarantula? UGH! A rock was a lot more humane than being eaten alive by baby wasps!
ReplyDeleteJust doing my bit here to keep down the population of New Mexico. Wouldn't want people to think life was too perfect here.
ReplyDeleteActually, this is only the second tarantula I've seen since moving to the 7MSN three years ago. Lord only knows where they hide most of the time, but both sightings have been in the fall. It's mating season for the little buggers.
Well, I have to play devil's advocate. I love all things creepy. Mostly because they keep down the bugs and rats. I took pictures and blogged about our tarantulas on June 6th if you're interested.
ReplyDeleteNow the rattle snake---I vote for rattle snake heaven. Tarantula, I vote for the broom. Oh well, maybe next time. :)
i am not fond of spiders... But like you I would have had to grab my camera first and made all kinds of noises as I took its picture... when I was a teen my mother and I had gone to valley center california to visit our cousins... we walked around to the front door and there was the biggest hairy spider I have ever seen... I have only heard my mother scream a couple times in my life and that was a ear drum breaker... my cousins hubby came outside and LAUGHED at us... he refused to kill it and I refused the front door for the rest of our stay there!
ReplyDeleteit was as big as my hand with all fingers stretched out ... so no less than 6 inches...ACK!
Ya know Linda, I've been so busy and haven't been by in a few days....and I pop over today and I about jump out of my seat!! I have a huge, real, terrifying FEAR of spiders! I could never live in Arizona or NM....without serious therapy! Nor could I visit New Zealand (I heard huge spiders lie in wait under one's car's sun visors.)
ReplyDeleteI just hope I can sleep tonight, LOL!
Oh by the way, I am curious to hear what you did with the hairy girl. I know I'm a teacher and I preach not killing anything as it has a purpose in life (that spider will eat other pesky spiders and insects) but really, do you want her producing a gazillion more of those? ;)
Even though I'm not crazy about spiders, I love New Mexico primarily because it's still wild and untamed in most parts. We have less than 2 million people in the whole state and it's a big state. Snakes, tarantulas, coyotes, hawks, bears, mountain lions, etc., etc., are a part of what makes this a great place to live - if you still like living in a wild place.
ReplyDeleteDan
Holy Jeepers! That's scary.
ReplyDeleteAs dangerous as they are, I guess I'm of the opinion that they're just doing spidery things. It's nothing personal.
So, I suppose I'd find a way to entice it into a jar or something and then drive it way out in the boonies somewhere and let it go. Hopefully, they don't have a homing instinct.
I went on a school trip once with a bunch of 10 year olds, and part of it was getting friendly with snakes, spiders, slugs, cockroaches - those sort of things. As I was there as one of the teachers' aids I felt I had to show I wasn't scared when all the boys were assuming I would be, so I let them put a tarantula on my hand. I can't say I enjoyed the experience, even though I knew it was harmless, but I'm glad I did it. It weighed practically nothing and its feet - do they have feet? - felt like pins touching you as it walked. It moved very slowly fortunately - if it has started to scuttle I would have freaked.
ReplyDeleteEwwwwwwwwwwwww! Icky!
ReplyDeleteI had a big spider in my living room today but nothing like this!
Oh I shudder. I vote for the big old rock.
ReplyDeleteWow! That's some spider!
ReplyDeleteI couldn't help but laugh when you said you swept it off the porch and threw a big rock down on top of it. I remember the post where you killed a snake by throwing a rock down on top of it. I imagine you having this giant stack of rocks ready just in case you need one! And a pile of dead vermin off the porch.
Carolynn? I don't know how Linda could take it out to the "boonies" as she pretty much lives way beyond the boonies. LOL!
I'm afraid I have to vote with the "great big rock" solution, too. :)
AAAAAAACCCCKKKKK!!!! Where on Earth do you live? We have like 1/2" spiders here that I can't tolerate. Yuck!
ReplyDeleteGetting in my shower yesterday I found what I considered a huge spider. I made my husband come and kill it. But seeing your tarantula there gives a little perspective. My "giant" spider could've been your tarantula's baby brother. Yikes! I definitely would've smoosed it!
ReplyDelete8 years of bad luck for murdering that spider!!!
ReplyDeletefear is the mind killer...